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Wednesday, June 16, 2010

The Femaliarisation of Our Male Species


It is funny when these days the topic of gender equality is raised in any context. It wasn't always like this though. Earlier it was a serious issue, a debatable topic that led to some serious arguments and discussions. There were so many things to be brought up under the said topic. For years the women of our country have fought to have an equal footing in society.

Now it is the time of the males. It is their turn to be treated as equals. And rightfully so.

The right to gender equality today is not only limited to a discussion among a group of bored, middle-aged uncles sitting in some god-forsaken studio of Doordarshan. They know the viewer has already got bored and switched off the TV (the one who has a cable and thus the option of something else other than DD would not have tuned into it in the first place!) and hence can carry on at their own sweet leisure. The right to gender equality today has become a much more visible and wider topic than it ever was.

And the male species has taken it upon themselves to make sure they are treated as equals.

One of the first area where they screamed and ranted for equality was the beauty parlour. Of course a men's beauty parlour cannot be called so. Hence it was aptly given the chic name of a Men's Salon, but of course it still remains a beauty parlour.
The men of our generation made sure they got their rightful share of beauty treatment. But of course they couldn't make it so obvious, hence the term 'metrosexual male' was coined. Metrosexual - a man who goes for his regular sessions of bleaching, waxing, threading, facial, pedicure, manicure, blackhead removal, hair treatment, hair colouring, straightening, longer hair styles, ponytails, wears ear-rings, even wears black nail paint sometimes and doesn't shy, wears pink (thankfully some guys still know how much pink is okay) and does all those things that he should rightfully deserves. Well well well...and it seems to be a pretty shallow well too. Meterosexual - a heavy and intense word, designed to make girls swoon when they say 'I'm a meterosexual male you know.' Hmmm.....if only they knew how invaluable a topic they were providing for the next few b****y session ;)

Still we, as civilised and polite grown-ups, have learned to ignore such vanity. But there are a few instances that are too good to keep a straight face.

Last weekend we were at the mall when I spotted a guy, wearing, wonder of all wonders, a short embroidered kurti with jeans !!! No, it wasn't any unisexual kurti, it was simply the kinds that are worn short by females....And it had flowers and vines embroidered all over it. He was accompanied by a male and a female. Me being the lovely curious busy-body that I am, did a complete U-turn and again walked past him, shopping basket in hand, looking here and there and looking straight at the dress. I couldn't control the laugh and decided to move away for a few minutes. As soon as I had had my share of giggles I did a U-turn again, this time curious to see his face. He looked okay, had a moustache too.....but the kurti did it again and I ran ;)

I pointed out the same to hubby and he couldn't help but roll his eyes....

And as we were coming out of the mall....can you believe it...a couple walked in, who was clearly gay but that is very much common now in Mumbai and was not the point, and one of the guys had a small purse in his hand which he was swinging on his finger Madhubala style !!! And he wasn't playing any games there, he actually was seriously doing that....Dressed in veryyyy tight jeans and a pink top, he had a ladies' purse in his hand, the strap of which was dangling from a finger and he was swinging the purse....tee too tee too....WHAT !!!! And as he moved past me and I obviously turned to take a priceless look - I saw the swing of the hips too...eeeeee.....why, oh why, did I turn? I mean, come on...I have seen many gay couples in the malls, holding hands, one guy carrying a female handbag while the other is clearly the 'guy', strutting, pouting, cuddling - and it's nothing unusual, just another way of life, but this!!

I don't know what is happening to the male species..they used to be so so dashing, with their terribly amazing masculine charm, muscular bodies, sporty and elegant dressing, their rawness was actually something that always managed to turn on the fairer sex....well if someone were to ask us, we don't want a 'chikna' dude, we dont want these sissies that are being churned out of who-knows-where each day, and why would we be turned on with a pedicured and manicured doll? Isnt that supposed to be working the other way round?

If things carry on at this rate, one day the world might simply turn pink....Oh no, what a NIGHTMARE !!!!

If any guy happens to read this right now, could you enlighten please on this very serious issue that has descended on us poor souls ?